The Past That Never Died
by JaMeSgRiFfItHs101
Summary: Haha. That's the weirdest title in the world but it makes sense with what I'm doing. This is Jasper's POV on his past. I made up some stuff...quite a lot actually but I wanted it to be like no story you've ever read before!
1. Prologue

**Me: Okay, so I'm rebelling against A/N and Disclaimer and I am being original. So tell me what you think of this story. This is sort of just the set up for the story so its kind of slow but more stuff will happen soon...if I can figure out what to do next... **

**Prologue **

I spun and dropped to the ground then quickly recovered myself. I turned around and took a step backwards. That fatal step. She was behind me.

"You lose!" she giggled in my ear.

"Again," I admitted in defeat.

She laughed at me.

"Is something on your mind? You don't usually lose to me five times in a row!" she asked me. That was Alice. Always concerned for everyone else. Never herself. Maybe that was why I loved her.

"Actually, yeah, kind of. I was think we should...take a vacation," I insisted.

"Do you need to go hunting again? The last trip was only a few days ago!" Alice put her hands on her hips and looked at me like she was scolding me.

"No. That's not what I meant. I was...sort of...hoping you'd want to join me."

Alice laughed. "I'd consider it if you told me where we're going first."

"Texas?" I remarked.

Alice appeared shocked. "If that's where you'd like o go, I'll come with you. But...I've got to tell Carlisle. Don't worry ,I can get everything set up. I'm sure you'll let the rest of the family come?"

She didn't give me time to answer before deciding herself the everyone should come.

Then I started to block her out while she explained the whole vacation she had planned. I had a sense of longing quite suddenly. Perhaps I was just eager to go back, but it felt like a serious attraction to something in particular. Maybe someone?

"...and we should get there by tomorrow...does that sound good with you?" Alice asked.

"Yeah. Excellent," I murmured. Usually it's best to listen to everything Alice says since she manages to fit a shopping trip in somewhere but I guess I'd just have to pay the price for ignoring her.

I had been increasingly spacing out to whoever was talking to me. It was almost like someone else was trying to talk to me. Someone taking over.

I decided I was overreacting.

Due to the fact that Alice had taken the plans upon herself, we arrived in Texas the next day. It was an incredibly painful journey for me. Although we had gone hunting a few days before I wanted more. The feelings I had for Texas were split between the sense that this was where I had grown up, and thirst for when I had drunk human blood here.

We ran most of the time but whenever we took a break requested we hunted. We never did and I gave up my attempt.

Alice had already put together a whole agenda for us. We should start out where I wanted to go, Austin, and we would save Galveston for the end. She insisted we go to the Stockyards in Fort Worth and the Cowgirl Museum and I didn't bother to argue with Alice. At least not this early in the vacation. I was not ready to lose.

When we arrived at the museum in Austin, (ummm I know the name of this place! I dunno, I'll ask someone school!) I paused. If I were breathing, my breath would have caught in my throat. Unintentionally, my mind whizzed back to the newborns, to Maria, to the scars on my arms, which I called my "battle wounds" although we all knew they had come after the battle, and then...to _her._ Lila...

I'd tried so hard to forget about her. The very sound of her name made me cringe with guilt. My own guilt was more painful than feeling twenty other people's guilt.

I missed her. I could never get rid of that fact. Returning here had given me the lust for her again, the feeling of what we'd done the night before I'd left her---never to return.

"Jazz, are you okay?" Alice asked me.

"Yeah. I'm just taking in...everything."

Alice smiled at me and grabbed my hand to give a quick squeeze. She slipped her arm through mine and we walked down the first row of things. Most of the history was from the Alamo but there was a Civil War exhibit.

"Did you wear on of _those?_" I turned my head an saw Rosalie pointing at the glass case with a hint of distaste in her voice.

It was a replica of my old uniform. It was a gray coat with buttons on each side like one of those long trench coat jackets that look like the matrix although this one was not nearly as long because it had to be easy to move in. The pants were bland and gray also but they were held up by suspenders. A holster was slung across the shoulder. I suppose this uniform could not be said as one that was "particularly fashionable" especially for the modern age but it was easy to maneuver in. Plus, I looked so good already, the uniform could not dull down my good looks...or at least that's what I tell anyone who makes fun of me...namely, Rosalie.

Rosalie smirked and walked ahead of us. She could laugh all she wanted, she was just jealous she didn't have an awesome uniform I thought to myself knowing I was lying.

"I think you would look handsome in it," Alice whispered to me.

I smiled and we walked by. I paused at the next glass case.

"Oh! Look at this! It's real silver!" Alice pointed at a small silver cup on the right side of the display case.

I almost choked. I recognized the cup.

"That's mine!" A rush of memory flooded back into my head as I remembered when my mother had given me the silver cup and warned me that it was rather fragile.

"Okay, Darling," Alice patted my arm in a motherly understanding way to cover up my interruption because I was sure a few people had turned their heads.

"Great," I thought."Now everyone probably thinks I'm retarded."

At least that was all they thought about me. It was better than the cold truth that I was a bloodsucking animal.

We walked past a Confederate flag but I remained silent this time.

"That went well," Edward murmured while we stepped outside of the grand building. He avoided the sun until the rest of us joined him.

"Where to now?" Carlisle asked Alice

"Now we've got to go to the Cowgirl Museum! After we check that out we can go to the Stockyards, which is apparently a great tourist attraction! Then we can go to Galveston tonight or tomorrow. I wonder if the battle ground is open all night," Alice remarked.

Carlisle said nothing but I felt that hew as trying to keep a positive attitude. Esme seemed generally in high spirits. Rosalie---bored but even without my power it was obvious to tell. She had done nothing to conceal that fact to the naked eye. Edward didn't care where he was because he just wanted to be where someone was. Bella? I guessed. Emmett was eagerly looking around, taking in everything. Alice,

well, her excitement was not contained in any way.

Then, there was someone else. A strong emotion threw me off balance. Such a fullness of happiness spread through my body. It was so joyous I wasn't sure I could handle it.

"Jazz?" Alice said plainly, attempting to help hold me up.

"Yes, Alice, Darling," I almost sang and regained my posture.

"Are you doing all right?"

"Yes. I am. I am doing perfectly fine. Let's just keep moving."

I glanced back. No one looked very excited---no quite _that_ excited at least.

"You heard him" Alice responded, unhooking herself from my arm. "Let's get out of here."

**Me: It's short but please review!**


	2. Chapter 1

**Me: The Cowgirl Museum rocks! My darling Alice knows all about the cowgirl museum. We had an interesting encounter there! Anyway, I would like to say thank you to TrulyFrighteninLilMonsterAlice who added me to her favourites list! Yay! I love fans! **

**Chapter 1:  
**

We ran to the Cowgirl Museum although I as slightly shaky. I told the others I wanted to go hunting but I was really concerned by the passion of someone's excitement...someone...

"_I...I just don't want you to go!"_

_"I've got to! I'm with the army. I don't have a choice."_

_"Just tell them you're only seventeen! Tell them you're too young! I won't let them take you from me."_

_"Please, Lila. They're not making me do this...I want to," I'd said. I whipped a tear from the girls cheek. She seemed so fragile. She had pale skin, long blonde hair...the general beauty of the era. But she was more than beautiful._

_"I just don't want you to get hurt!" Lila cried. "What if I never see you again? What if you never come back?"_

_"How can you think that? I promise I'll write to you every week! I'll come back for you. After the war, I'll come back to you. Then we can be together..."_

_"Yes. We can get married and have a lovely, grand wedding. But...I don't know if I can wait that long. I want to marry you...right now."_

_"Maybe your dad will accept me when I come back. He needs time. We all need time if you really want to do this---"_

_"Oh, yes! I do want it. I want you---" she cut off and pressed her warm body against me. She was a proper lady like all other decent woman were, yet she was different. _

_Lila was more of an independent girl. She refused to be held back by anything---ever. She was also very intimate about me. I could feel it by the way she pressed her body against mine, the way she held the last lingering seconds on my lips when we kissed, the way she grabbed my arm with such a promising grip the day I'd left for Mexico..._

I noticed I was smiling, sort of stupidly.

"Oh, Jasper, do you have something for her?" Rosalie whispered, indicating her head toward the screen where a young brunette woman was standing next to a stable.

"Shut up, Rose. I was thinking!" I pushed on her lightly.

Emmett whispered something into her ear and she laughed while he smiled. I ignored them because they both looked at me an laughed some more.

After the short film was over, we headed over to a fake rocking bull surrounded by a green screen. I'd never bothered to learn how it is done, but Alice decided that we should all have a turn on the bull. She went first, looking like a well practiced cowgirl.

Alice moved the bull back and forth on her own and waved her hand in the air while keeping the other hand on the rocking bull. She appeared to actually be riding. The green screen made the background feature a rodeo. She insisted the rest of us do it. Whatever she says goes.

Carlisle was definitely the most entertaining as his expression clearly stated this had to be one of the stupidest things he'd ever done.

Emmett enjoyed it. A little too much, but when we finally got him off and we learned the museum would be closing shortly.

I was surprised. It was only 22:00 hours. That's 10:00 PM, by the way. That was the one thing that had stuck with me after I'd left the army. Military time.

Alice was always annoyed when I told her the time in military time because I could figure it out faster than her. It makes me laugh.

We spent much longer at the museum than what was originally intended. In the end, Emmett was the one who was sad to be leaving because he was attracted to a blonde usher dressed up like a cowgirl. She seemed to be having a hard time leaving him alone also---before she saw Rosalie.

On the way out, we passed a bench. I fell behind the others as I grabbed onto the bench handle to stop from falling over. I had gotten another rush of powerful emotion. This time was worse, this time it was pain.

I fell to my knees, clutching my wrist. I tried my hardest not to scream I was shaking violently. Then pain spread through the rest of of my body. It would be difficult for me to describe if you've never been ripped apart.

"Jasper!"

"Alice?" I looked up and saw the small vampire. She was knelt next to me. Her eyes were wide and she appeared perplexed and slightly afraid, which was unusual for her.

"What's going on?"

"I...don't know," I cringed again. Why was this happening? "It hurts," I told her. "Everything hurts."

Alice glanced around. "Carlisle, come over here!"

Carlisle moved toward me. He looked worried as well. "Explain," he indicated to Alice to talk.

She shrugged.

Instead I spoke up, "I hurt. I feel someone's pain, a lot, badly."

"Can you move? I can't do very much to help you since is not a physical problem," Carlisle responded.

I nodded and took a deep breath. Emmett and Carlisle helped to steady me.

"Do you want to keep going? Maybe we should keep the Stockyards for tomorrow?" Edward suggested. "What do you think, Alice?" No reply.

"Alice?"

Alice had no response. Her eyes were glazed over with a faraway stare.

"Alice?" Edward tried again.

"Huh?" she snapped back to reality, out of her vision.

"What did you see?" Edward asked.

Alice came over to me. "Do you know anyone---a girl, very pretty, blonde, long hair, thin---I...I just can't get a name..." Alice thought hard.

How did she know? It sounded exactly like Lila from the vague description. But it could be anyone---couldn't it? Lila was dead.

"Do you know her??" Alice asked again.

"She doesn't sound familiar," I lied.

"Why?" I wondered.

"I...don't know yet. She's just what I saw."

**Me: Short but I love writing the flashbacks! REVIEW!**


	3. Chapter 2

**Me: I finally got another chapter here. Sorry for the wait! I've been really busy lately. The NEW SIMPLE PLAN CD JUST CAME OUT AND PANIC! AT THE DISCO IS COMING OUT IN MARCH! YAY!!!! So, this is a chapter from my dearest Alice, but she made me type up the whole thing instead of just sending it to me... so it took a little bit longer.****  
**

**Chapter 3:**

One thing I learned in Texas was how much they love their nightlife. They make Seattle look like a funeral, and Forks would never even come close in dreams.

Carlisle and Esme opted out of touring Dallas, but decided to meet us at the Six Floor Museum around midnight. The est of us decided to walk through the city until we found something to do. We ended up inside of Reunion Tower, which was pretty amazing at night. We looked out over the city from every direction, but it moved so slowly that we began to leave. We were almost to the elevators when Edward froze.

"There's another level!" he explained, grinning.

He dashed over to a set of stairs that were barricaded by a velvet rope. He started to unhook it when a young waitress accosted us.

"Excuse me, sir, that area isn't in use just now If you'd like a table to dinner, I can seat you over----"she stopped short as Edward smiled at her. I saw Rosalie roll her eyes.

"We just wanted to get a better view of the city. It won't take long, but if you'll get in trouble for it, we can leave," Edward explained smoothly.

I could barely contain my laughter as the waitress nodded numbly.

"Of...of course not! Go ahead. If anyone asks, tell them I gave you permission," shuttered out, still watching Edward.

"'Yes, thank you, um...Mandy,"Edward smiled, starting up the stairs.

The waitress walked away with a flustered expression. Emmett shoved Edward in a brotherly way. "Poor Mandy. She never had a chance," he teased, laughing as Edward shoved him back.

When we reached the top of the stirs, I perched on the railing as the others fanned out. Jasper came to stand beside me. When I looked over at him, he was staring out into space, his face showed no emotion. Concerned, I set a hand on his arm.

"Jazz, are you okay?" I whispered, watching for his reaction. He flinched and I drew back. He looked confused for a moment, then turned toward me.

"What? Sorry, Alice. Did you say something?"

I pouted. "Yeah. I asked if you were all right. You seemed distracted. Aren't you having fun?"

He sighed. "Of course I am. Don't look at me that way," he said as I gave him a look of pity if he weren't enjoying himself.

"It's just...never mind. Let's go meet Carlisle and Esme," he started to walk away from me.

I was so focused on his mood, I didn't have time to prepare.

The vision came swiftly, and before I could move, I was falling backwards over the railing. I felt someone's arm wrap around my waist and jerk me back into the room.

Satisfied that I wasn't falling, I gave myself into the vision.

The pretty blonde girl was back now. She was actually in a location I recognized this time. She was at the museum we had toured earlier that day. She flashed the security guard a pass, and he stepped aside to let her go through.

She skipped past the Alamo exhibit and headed straight for the Civil War section. She paused by the case containing Jasper's silver cup. She gazed into the case with a strange expression on her pretty face, then moving on, she checked out the rest of the museum as we had.

The girl returned to the cup after she had finished. She looked frustrated, but her expression turned to one that was uncertain to me. I wasn't the one who could always examine emotions. She traced her slender fingers over the glass case, then dashed, faster than any human, out the door and into the night. I strained to see where she was heading----

"Alice? Allie?" Jasper's soft voice pulled me back into the present.

"Hmm? What?" I asked, looking up at him. He had me in his arms, and I realized he was the one who had caught me.

"Oh. Thanks. That was close," I said, sitting up beside him. Edward had wandered over to us. Emmet and Rosalie were close behind.

"What did you see?" Jasper questioned, and I thought for a second I heard urgency in his usually calm voice. I convinced myself that I'd imagined it.

"I saw the same girl from before," I answered slowly, "She was at the museum in Austin. She's definitely a vampire. Oh, and I think she has a good cover story, because the guard just waved her into the exhibit at 11:30 at night."

"23:30 hours," Jasper muttered under his breath.

"Oh, shut up," I said, rolling my eyes. I swear, he does that just to annoy me.

"Still no name?" Edward asked, a puzzled expression on his face.

"Still no name, I echoed as Jazz pulled me to my feet, "It's odd. Maybe it'll come to me later."

Emmett looked down at his watch, the one he almost never wears, and then back at us. 'Well, as much as I'd love to discuss this some more with you, we'd better get going. Elevators aren't that fast, and we still need to make it to the Six Floor Museum by midnight."

"Um...Emmett? Midnight is still an hour away," Edward state in confusion.

Emmett looked confused then took off the watch and put it back on the opposite way. "Oh, that's what that arm means!"

Rosalie flipped her long hair over her shoulder then started down the stairs anyway.

"Oh...umm...okay," Edward said to no one in particular. "Emmett, go ahead with her. We'll follow you in a minute."

Emmett and Rosalie descended the staircase, and turned to Edward in complete frustration.

"What are you talking about? What was he thinking,?" I asked impatiently.

"Rose was bored and wanted to leave. Emmett just wanted to take the elevator down alone with her," he replied, snickering as he started down the stairs.

I tugged on Jasper's sleeve, pulling him to my side as we followed Edward into the elevator. He put an arm over my shoulder and hugged me to him until we got off.

When we entered the lobby, Emmett and Rose were sitting way too quietly on a bench. I could tell, however, bu the smeared lipstick on Emmett's cheek and shirt collar that he'd gotten what he wanted. I smiled the elbowed Jazz so he would look as well. He grinned at me, and lead me over to them.

"Ready to go?" Emmett asked coolly, ignoring Edward's muffled laughter.

"Sure," Edward choked out. Rosalie glared at him, and he immediately stopped laughing.

Emmett put an arm around Rose's shoulder and lead her out of the building, at which point Edward couldn't help but burst into laughter.

Jasper snickered, ten began to laugh, even harder, affected by his emotions, and seeing them both happy made me start to laugh too.

When we finally stopped laughing, we headed out after Rose and Emmett. It didn't take long to find hem since Edward was with us. We then headed over to meet Esme a Carlisle at the Six Floor Museum. The museum itself was closed, but we stood out on the monument to JFK, he president who had been shot in Dallas. I still remember that day.

We hung out until ten the next day, when we went to the place I was really excited about.

The Fort Worth Stockyards.

**Me: I went to the Stockyards with Alice a few weeks ago and we saw a silver cup like the one from my first chapter! It was wicked cool and she started laughing at me... :( for the rest of the day... :( :( :(**


	4. Chapter 3

** Me: So I've demonstrated the work of myself as well as the work of "Alice." This time I will let you guess...who do you think wrote this chapter:) ****  
**

**Chapter 4:**

I entered the Stockyards the next day with Alice on my arm, and Lila on my mind. Since the cowgirl museum, I had walked in a daze, not focused on any aspect of our trip in particular. The stockyards did cheer me up slightly, as most people were enjoying the warm Texas weather. Lucky for us, it was cloudy. I was having a bit more fun than I'd had so far, but my mind kept drifting back to her.

What was wrong with me? I was in love with Alice1 She was my wife! I'd do anything for her...wouldn't I?

Oh, why was I even thinking about Lila? She had been dead for at least half a century. Unless the girl in the visions Alice had had was her.

I smiled as I remembered her pretty face, her slender body. I couldn't picture her any more beautiful than she had been then, but if she was now a vampire, she would be.

Lila had been perfection. She had made my life so happy, so worthwhile. She had been seductive, powerfully so. She almost always got her way. I wondered if that had increased since she had been changed. If she had been changed.

I snapped out of my thoughts as someone tugged on my sleeve. I looked down at Alice, who was standing with her hands on her hips.

"What is it?" I asked, trying to sound happy. I only managed confusion.

"I need twenty dollars for that hat," Alice replied, bouncing up and down impatiently. Her emotions amused me. Who knew someone could get that excited over a hat?

"Another hat? Don't you have fifty already?"

She scowled but I knew she wasn't angry. "I only have thirty- six hats actually. This one makes thirty-seven. But I don't own a cowboy hat, and I want one, so I'm going to buy one. Are you coming?" she smiled, already turning toward the store.

"Nah. I'll wait here," I said, running a hand over her short black hair. "Just don't go crazy. I'd hate to lose you to the jewelry section."

She smiled again, then practically skipped into the store. I watched until she disappeared behind a rack of shirts, then headed over to the maze across the street, away from all of the others.

I stood on the observation deck, seeing all the dead ends and locating the correct route in seconds. I leaned over the railing, looking down at all the clueless humans trying to figure it out.

I sat down and started thinking about my past. It had been so hard. So lonely. So...painful. I sighed as my mind drifted back to when I was able to take love for granted. Back to the days when I had Lila.

_"Jasper! Jasper!"_

_"Lila? I thought your father was keeping you at home! How did you get here?"_

_"He thinks he is keeping me at home. But I came anyway. I promised the stable boy extra dinner if he'd bring me my horse and not tell father. I don't understand why he doesn't want me to be here! You're wonderful!"_

_I smiled at her, kissing her forehead._

_"I guess sometimes people just don't understand. I'm sure he'll come around eventually. You're his only daughter! I'm sure he wants to see you happy and __married," I replied as she kissed me back, holding me close. She looked up at me and frowned._

_"I know he does, but not to you. I don't care. If we have to, I won't ask for his permission. I love you, Jasper, and I know you love me. That's all the matters here," she sighed, resting her head against my chest. I smiled, loving every moment. _

_"Yes, Lila. I love you. Thats what really matters."_

"Jasper! Jazz!"

I snapped out of my memories as Alice called to me. She was across the street, waving with one hand, holding her shopping bag in the other. I stood slowly and began making my way down the stairs toward the street.

That was when it came.

A rush of sudden emptiness surrounded me, and as Alice stepped off the curb, I realized with horror that she wouldn't reach me in time. Her vision was coming back, she just didn't know it yet.

I always got that strange, hollow feeling just before Alice froze. I'd never told her that. I wasn't sure why. It gave me an advantage, a forewarning, and I took it for granted.

Alice was still moving toward me, crossing the street.

"Alice, hurry!' I called out, dashing down the stairs as fast as I could while still appearing human, "Hurry! Please!"

Alice stared at me.

"What are you---" Then I felt her shock register as the vision was upon her. Her eyes went blank and she began to fall. Right into the center of the road.

A wave of emotion went through me again, but this time, it was my own. It was fear. What if I didn't reach her before someone else did?

I didn't have to worry for long. Emmett had opened the door of a shop just in time to spot Alice headed toward the street. He let go of the door darted into the road, scoped Alice up and crossed to me. He handed her over to me, and we exchanged a silent thanks. He turned back for Rosalie, who was clearly frustrated that he hadn't held the door for her.

I sat on the bench closest to me and gazed down at the petite vampire girl in my arms. She always looked so fragile but now even more than usual. Her eyes were open, but unseeing to the present world around her.

It was times like this when she truly depended on me. She was vulnerable wen she had her visions. She couldn't move. She couldn't react. I was her shield.

She was the one I truly loved. She had to be. I convinced myself that as I held her closer. I'd promised myself that I'd protect her, and I had. Nothing had ever hurt Alice when I was with her. Nothing ever would.

Suddenly, the hollow feeling pulled away and Alice's bubbly persona returned with a snap. She sat up quickly, looking confused. I laughed, as she turned to me.

"What----what happened? How did I get here? Who got me?" she asked, looking around for the others.

"Emmett caught you and brought you to e," I replied, wrapping my arms around her slender waist, "What did you see?"

Almost immediately, I sensed her apprehension.

"Alice?"

She was silent for a moment, then turned to fix me with a searching stare that I almost shrank away from her with the intensity of her eyes watching my face.

"Jasper..." her voice trailed off and she bit her bottom lip nervously. "I think it was...well, I mean... maybe I'm just crazy, but I thought it was..."

She was so unsure of herself. That frightened me a bit.

"Just spit it out, Allie! What's wrong? What did you see?"

Alice hesitated before saying, "Jasper...I thought it was...or will be..." she paused again before saying the word she dreaded to say.

**Me: REVIEW!!!!**

"I think it was Maria."


	5. Chapter 4

**Me: I am dreadfully sorry about the massive wait between chapters but I had 5 tests at school and it is finally spring break! This chapter, like the last, was written by "Alice." It is also in her point of view this time. Hope you enjoy...  
**

**Chapter 5:**

When I uttered her name, the effect was instantaneous. Jasper's face darkened, and I felt him tense beneath me as he recalled those dark, desolate days in his past.

He instinctively pulled me closer, as if he was protecting me from some unseen enemy. Maybe he thought he was.

When he regained his composure, he turned back to me, and I heard that rare flicker of fear behind his calm voice.

"Alice…are you positive?" He asked carefully.

I bit my lip while I thought. "Well, she certainly fits your descriptions of her. She is a vampire yet Hispanic, darker hair, curly. I'm almost positive…" My voice trailed off, and I knew he could taste my uncertainty.

"Alice," he began, "I trust you, but we need to be completely sure before we act. What exactly was the woman doing? Do you know where she was?" He questioned, thinking things through like the soldier he was.

I leaned into him again, letting him support me as I focused on the images of the future that crowded my thoughts.

My focus zeroed in on the Hispanic vampire. She was running though the city streets, a younger vampire at her side. They flew past a huge building that resembled the white house, and that's when I realized where they were.

My head snapped up to look into Jasper's startled eyes.

"What is it?" he asked tentatively.

"Austin!" I blurted. He stared at me uncomprehendingly.

"They're in Austin! I just saw the capitol building!"

"Austin…isn't that where the blonde vampire was?" Jasper mused. I confirmed his thoughts.

"Yeah. Yeah she was…The Hispanic vampire had another vampire with her just now. They were running. The second one was young, she was helping him learn." I rambled on about my vision, hoping to find a useful scrap of information that I'd overlooked. It was Jasper, however, who supplied me with it.

"Alice…did the Hispanic--did either vampire have…you know…" He hesitated, rubbing his hand up his opposite arm.  
"War wounds?" I asked softly, placing my smaller hand over his.

"War wounds," he echoed, "Did they?"

I focused once more. His arms stayed around me protectively.

I looked at the woman and the young vampire. Their arms and necks were covered in turtleneck shirts. I was ready to give up, but then I spotted the younger one's neck as he moved foreword.

The three overlapping crescent marks, barely visible to humans, seemed to flare like a warning sign. I pulled out of the vision quickly, sucking in a very unnecessary breath.

"What? What is it?" Jasper's voice was strangely impatient as he grabbed me by the shoulders to turn me towards him.

"The younger one has three marks, right here," I answered, placing my hand to my neck to demonstrate.

He released me and leaned back. I could tell that he was thinking things over, calculating the odds. I waited for him to finish, but his conclusion confused me.

"We need Edward." He stated suddenly, standing up and setting me on my feet.

"What? Why?" I asked, grabbing his arm as he started across the brick road and back towards the shops.

"Edward can confirm if it was Maria." he replied bluntly, pulling me around a group of clueless Californian tourists.

"How? He's never met her! How can he confirm anything?" I responded impatiently, still confused. Did Edward suddenly know everything?

"If you think of the woman from your vision, and then I think of…Maria…Edward will be able to tell if they're the same." He explained. We stopped for about two seconds flat, and suddenly Edward was there.

"What is it?" He asked, grinning. I realized that Jasper had called him mentally. Edward was expecting something stupid or amusing.

"Alice and I are each going to think of a woman. We want you to clarify something and tell us if it's the same woman." Jasper explained quickly.  
"Sure. Alice, you go first." Edward dictated.

I clutched Jasper's arm for support, and focused on the woman in my vision. I held the image for a few seconds, then let it fade.

"Okay, now Jasper." Edward said, turning to face him.

Jasper closed his eyes to remember Maria, then opened them to watch Edward's reaction.

Edward shrugged. "Yeah, it's the same person." He confirmed.

I felt Jasper stiffen beside me.

"What's wrong? Who is it?" Edward questioned warily, not missing Jaspers infinitesimal movement.

Jasper said nothing. He just turned and walked away. Edward turned to look down at me.

"Who was it?"

I hesitated, the thought the answer to him silently.

"It was Maria. Get the others."

**Me: Dun... dun...dun... review! Thank you to "Jasper", "Alice" and all the other people that have kept up with this story although I haven't had a chance to write anything in a long time!**


	6. Chapter 5

**Me: So the last three chapters have been by "Alice" so hopefully this makes sense in connection to what just happened. If you have any questions, if this makes no sense, just comment. And if you just want to tell me how much you love/hate the story than you can comment on that too.****  
**

**Chapter 5:**

I stiffened. How could Mari find me? I wasn't even sure if she was alive up to this point.

I grabbed Alice and pulled her across the railroad. I trusted she could take care of herself but that did not allay my fear as I parted with her to find Carisle and Esme while she searched for Rosalie and Emmett.

I turned into a hat shop (every other shop did have voluminous quantities of hats outlining the walls) and spotted Rosalie.

I moved toward her briskly while she leaned against a wall with her arms crossed, her expression between anger and hurt.

"Rosalie," I said loudly enough for anyone passing by to hear, then quieter I added, "What happened?"

"My ankle. I think it's broken. Some stupid younger man came in and---" she told me quietly before I shushed her.

Suddenly, I felt it too. "This might hurt a little," I warned, bending down beside her. I tried to manipulate her into happiness. I wanted her to stop hurting even if I gave the pain to myself instead. I applied pressure to her ankle bone and pushed it back into place with my thumb. The rest of my hand steadied her foot.

Rosalie stumbled but I grabbed her hand and coerced her to walk with me.

"Where is Emmet?" I asked.

"He waited for me on a bench outside," Rosalie replied, ignoring the pain in her ankle. I ignored it too, although it was irking me with each step she took.

I located Emmett quickly. His eyes were wide when he spotted Rosalie.

"Oh my god! What happened to you? Is this what took you so long?"

Rosalie nodded.

I gently set her down on the bench. "Alice saw Maria in a vision a little while ago. We think she's coming," I explained briefly and a little bit too much to the point because it took a minute for the couple to react. "Who did this to you?"

"I think it was a newborn. He was so fast, even I had trouble keeping up. He just came in. At first I thought he might attack the cashier but he headed straight for me and started attacking me. The cashier had left and we were the only ones in the store. I wouldn't let him bite me so he managed to do that," she pointed to her ankle, "Instead."

"I've got to find Alice and see if she has Carlisle and Esme yet."

I looked at every shop up and down the street until I got to the candy shop where I finally found Alice.

She giggled when she saw me, "Jazz, look at this."

It was then that it hit me how thirsty I was. I smelled the sweet scent of the young brunette cashier girl and it wasn't just the scent of her berry shampoo.

I bit my lip and walked toward Alice to read the small candy package that she held up.

A blood pop, it was called. Like a lollipop but...not. How fitting.

I snatched it from her almost against my will and bit into it.

Alice looked at me in shock but it was nothing compared to the cashier's expression. "Sir, you must pay for that," she told me.

I bit into it.

Strawberry flavor. Disgusting. I spat out the remains for the wanna-be blood pop and grasped Alice's hand before darting out of the store.

Esme and Carlisle were waiting with everyone else once we got back. I secretly rolled my eyes at Alice for getting distracted in a candy shop instead of looking for everyone else first.

"We've got to get out of here!" I said quickly in one breath.

"Is Maria here? Did you see her?" Edward asked, ready to run.

"Actually...this candy cashier is after me now," I replied as seriously as I could.

Alice laughed and everyone else just exchanged looks to decide if I was crazy or not.

With Emmett supporting Rosalie, we headed away from Fort Worth and to the battle grounds of Galveston.

This whole trip had been completely whimsical from where we were going to when we would be able to hunt. I had just dealt with what we had since it had been my impulse to go on this trip in the first place.

But now that we had arrived in Galveston, a new impulse of desire to see what had become of where I had used to live was far worth everything I endured.

**Me: Thanks to ohhemmettx3, piratelizard101, bloodredeclipse for staying with me. If anyone else is still with me, please comment so I know you haven't abandoned me!**


	7. Chapter 6

**Me: I was pleasantly surprised that most people enjoyed my last chapter even though I didn't really have anything going for it. Yay bloodpops! Well, this one actually has a purpose to the story. **

I felt another strong impulse to go forward. I didn't know where I was going but I wanted to get there. There was something I yearned for. 

It was more than a yearning. I needed it.

"_Lila?"_

_"Shhh... I shouldn't be here. My father warned me not to see you again."_

_"Then you shouldn't be here. Hat if your father learns of your whereabouts?"_

_"It won't matter. You'll be gone y then, I had to come say good-bye to you," Lila's eyes reflected an icy glaze and I knew she was about to cry._

_I breathed in, feeling guilty about leaving. "I told you I'll see you again after the war is over."_

_"What if you're killed? What if you never do come back?"_

_My heart jumped slightly. I tried to come up with an answer._

_"I'm sorry. That was so horrible for me to say. Just come back to me. I need you..."_

The same attraction pulled me onward. I continued with an increasing feeling that something was wrong---but nothing could stop me.

I wished I'd told someone where I was going.

I stopped suddenly and realized exactly where I was. This was the battle field. I looked around once and guessed this was hat had attracted me.

I recalled gun shots and ditches to hide in while firing. 

I heard yelling and explosions. I smelled blood but it wasn't the delicious sensation I had been used to for so long.

In fact, it was slightly sickening. 

I knew I was imagining everything as it had been then... 

My thoughts flashed again.

_I saw the vampire near me. He was ravenous but younger than me and inexperienced. _

_"You've got to be the strongest to survive."_

_That was what Maria had told e in the beginning. That was what she told me when she rewarded me. That was what she told me before every battle. I had learned it well._

_I ran at the newborn and held its throat. _

_He went crazy and threw me off of him._

_I picked myself up and came toward him again._

_I kicked at his head. He stopped for a minute to realize I had hit him._

_He was enraged. He grabbed my arm. _

_I tried to twist free and although I knew fighting tactics, he had more energy. He bit down._

_I held back a gasp. A shout. Anything was a sign of weakness._

_I lunged at him again like an animal. I punched his stomach and grabbed his arm. If I could only rip it off..._

_I heard it dislocate and I felt his pain. I touched my own arm lightly then turned back to him. I felt his anger, also, which urged me on. _

_He growled and came toward me._

_I moved fast and hurried behind him. I grabbed his hurt arm and brought it to my mouth in one quick motion. _

_I tasted the blood. Not real blood---not like human blood...it was not as full and tasty. _

_Once again, the pain was overwhelming. I pushed the newborn back and pressed my weight on top of him. _

_He lay on the ground and I knew he was dead. _

_I wiped the blood off my mouth and went to find Maria..._

My mind snapped back to the now. I had been foolish back then but I had learned no other way.

If I had been taught to resist the blood, if I hadn't been taught to be an animal, I could fight the temptation when I smelt blood. 

I was always the one to be looked after. I was always the first to crack when I smelled a hurt human. I was weak because of it, and I hated it.

I hated Maria for making me like this. Not a vampire, but uncontrollable. 

I closed my eyes and tried not to remember any other fights I'd had on this battlefield. 

I felt a throbbing in my arm as I recalled the fight with the newborn whose arm I'd dislocated.

I pulled up my sleeve. I fingered the bite marks up my arm but it was nothing compared to what I'd done to most of them. 

Suddenly, I gasped in realization of what had brought me to this battlefield in the first place. Although it seemed impossible, a single name came to mind...Lila.

Perhaps the battlefield had brought back memories of her. Of writing letters to her. Of her face the last time I'd seen her before I left. 

That was when I heard a scream and I knew it was coming from the present time.

I ran toward the cry.

"Alice!" I called instinctively. I knew it was her.

"Alice, where are you?" I asked but as I expected, there was no reply.

Then I reached the corner covered with trees. The leafy branches reached out to me but I beat them out of my way.

"Alice!" I called for a third time. 

Then I spotted her. Although I think it would have been better for me if I hadn't. She was lying on the ground. She looked scratched and beaten up. 

"Alice! Alice, get up!" I called.

But there didn't seem to be much of a chance that she would reply. There wasn't a chance that she would be getting up soon---or ever.

**Me: Whoop! Doesn't everyone love happy endings? Oh yeah and my friend looked up 'whoop' the other day and it's actually in the dictionary!**


	8. Chapter 7

**Me: Sorry for that last dramatic ending! And I only got 2 comments so far...well, maybe its because its only been a few hours. I'm easily discouraged. Anywho, you probably don't care about this when you have a dramatic ending to read!**

I began to run toward her. Then, suddenly, I stopped. I... didn't want her. I spun around.

Lila was standing there. She looked more beautiful than even at our last encounter. She smiled. 

I blinked, completely dazed. Why did I want to have Lila for my own? Why didn't I try to save Alice?

I couldn't even turn my head to avoid Lila's strong gaze.

I reached out and touched her face. I had to convince myself she was real and she was here. She wanted me still after I'd abandoned her.

"Jasper..." she whispered. My eyes hung on her lips as she said my name. If it were only y lips instead of my eyes, I thought.

"I'm sorry, Lila. I told you I would never leave you. How could I be happy without you? I don't know how I've never survived at all without you."

"Shhh..." Lila's whisper silenced me as she pressed a finger to my lips.

I tried not to show her how excited I was to be touched my this girl. This vampire...

"You don't have to apologize. It just want one thing from you..." her quiet voice was seductive. She pulled her arms around my neck. I inhaled the sweet smell of her blonde hair.

I drew nearer to her. I placed my hips against hers and tilted my head inward to kiss her lips.

Lila put a hand against my chest. "No yet, Jasper."

"What's wrong?" I asked her. "Can't I and spotted us together. Some time had passed but all the time in the world seemed meaningless as long as I could kiss this girl. My darling Lila...

"This is a new age," Lila said slowly. "It means I don't have to be proper anymore. It means I can be as naughty as I like. I can give it all to you...but you must give me one thing."

"Give this to me first. Then I will do whatever you like," I promised, leaning toward her again.

"I will give you what you want. But you must give me what I want," Lila traced a finger gently over my chest and leaned against me so her just reached mine. 

Her lips were soft and I knew how much I wanted her now.

I was lost in the moment. But she had said it was a new time. Her father couldn't interrupt us. I could go as far as she'd let me. But instead, I released from the kiss.

"What is it that you want from me?"

Her eyes glowed with happiness. "Do you want me?" she asked. 

"Oh, yes. How could you ever think I---"

"I can give you your desires. You've experienced how I can give you a desire but I cannot let you have me if you don't want me. So...tell me, do you want me?"

I was hesitant.

"Say it. Just say 'I want you'."

"I---" I closed my eyes. Something inside me wouldn't let me say it. Someone...I turned my head to the girl...the vampire girl...Alice.

I thought about Philadelphia.

_I walked inside the small diner. A beautiful vampire came toward me. She had short dark hair and bright eyes._

_Although she was small, I stopped in my tracks and took a step back, expecting an attack. That was the reaction of all other vampires I'd encountered._

_"You've kept me waiting," she told me._

_I felt something I hadn't felt for years. A surge of hope pulsed through me as I tipped off my hat and replied, "Sorry, ma'am."_

"Jasper," Lila brought me back to face her. She drew closer to me. She gently nibbled on my ear. "Say you want me." She kissed down my neck.

"I---I can't. I---don't want you."

Lila kept her head by my neck but his time she selected the vein. What had I expected? She was a vampire now. She bit me. 

"You want Alice," she spat. She had the ability to give me a desire but she could not sustain it it I wanted something else. "Alice is dead! Now, you're going to be next!"

I admit, it hurt. A lot.

Lila bit me again. "I actually thought this could work out. I thought this could be like before."

I felt her incense turn to sadness, like before I'd left for Mexico. "Don't you remember? You promised me then too! I should have known you would break the promise."

I dropped to my knees. My pain, her sadness...this wasn't a good combination. 

Then I felt another pain. Someone else was here. Alive―or at least, undead. 

"Jazz..." a soft whisper gave me a sense of hope. The same thing I'd felt in Philadelphia. That was when I knew she was alive.

"You!" Lila turned toward Alice. "You're not dad?" Then Lila smiled. Although this was another usual seductive smile. There was a glint of evilness that reflected in her eyes. 

She grabbed Alice's thin body and pulled her to stand.

"You hurt me! I'm going to hurt you!" Lila declared as she grabbed Alice's arm and snapped it back. I heard a crack and I knew it was broken.

Alice would have cried if she could but instead, it was I who gasped in pain.

"Now look how this works. I can hurt her..." Lila demonstrated by biting Alice's neck. 

I cried out, "Let go of her."

"Then it hurts you to! How does it feel, Jasper? How does the pain feel? Does it hurt to be betrayed, like you did to me?"

I met Lila's red eyes and that was when I realized, she was completely crazy. 

I struggled past Alice's pain and my own and ran to Lila and pulled her off Alice.

"You hurt my Alice!" I breathed angrily.

She pushed me away from Alice.

So I lashed out. Punching her, hitting her, anything I could do.

She did not go down easily, until I bit her and said, "That was for Alice."

Her body seized up and I bit her again. Then a third time.

Lila fell to the ground. She was dead.

I ran to Alice. "Alice?" I touched her face gently. She was cold, but then, she always was.

"Alice, please wake up," I told her.

She groaned. "Thank you. You saved me," she whispered, her voice still weak.

I pulled her head into my lap, then helped her sit up so her head rested against my chest. 

"To think you considered marrying her!" Alice joked in disapproval. "She almost killed me!"

I tipped an invisible hat to her and replied, "Sorry, ma'am."

**Me: See! I would never kill my Alice! And I had to use that last line since that is my favourite thing from Eclipse. COMMENT! Or I might be tempted to leave you without the epilogue! MWAHAHAHAH! I guess that isn't that evil, its just an epilogue...oh well, MWAHAHA!**


	9. Epilogue

**Me: Sorry, this is really short but I thought for an epilogue it seemed appropriate. Please give your final comments or (hopefully not) concerns about the story. I love you all!**

**Epilogue**

I walked forward, cautiously. I knelt beside the cool stone and stared at the engraved letters.

Lila Cole

1844-2008

Rest in Peace

Carlisle had said we should respect her with a proper burial. I had half a mind to spit into the dirt covering the coffin and the other half of me felt pity for her. I was my own source of guilt. I had left her. She had come looking for me and that is what had changed her. It was all just to find me again.

When she did find me again, she had a right to be angry since I was married and I had never given her a second thought.

I shook these thoughts from my head. I recalled what she did to Alice a few days previous. It didn't help. The nagging guilt hung tight to my mind while I remembered all that we had done together. All that she had insisted on against her father's will.

_"Shhh...don't worry, he'll never know," she assured me pressing my lips to hers before I could reply._

_"I honestly cannot believe you. You are the only girl I would know who would find this fun. You almost have me genuflecting for you, doing whatever you wish," I told Lila. _

_Her long blonde hair was down so it tickled my bare chest. "Stop pretending, I know you enjoy everything that I bid you do." _

_"Oh...I forgot. I have something for you."_

_"A gift? How generous," Lila said, sweeping her hair away from her face. She beckoned me to get it for her. _

_I grabbed my coat that lay abandoned on the floor with my shirt. In a pocket in the inside, I produced a single pink tulip._

_Lila sighed. "Oh. It's beautiful! They're my favourite! Did you know?" She stuck the flower in her hair. _

_"No. But I do now," I explained, grabbing my shirt to prepare to leave._

_The girl laughed. "Where are you going? You're not leaving yet!" She grabbed my arm and pressed me against the wall so I had no escape._

I flashed back to the now and fingered the letters on the grave.

"I...really did love you before," I said to the cold stone. "I'm sorry we ended up this way. But you...are not Alice. However much I loved you before, you cannot be who I need. You cannot be my wife. You cannot be my joy, the only thing that keeps me going when even I lose myself. You cannot be my Alice."

With that, I turned away. I did not plan on returning again. But I did not leave until I had placed a single pink rose over the grave.

**Me: I kind of got this from the "Phantom of the Opera" now that I think about it but it worked so well! Personally I would have liked a rose over my grave, but that was too...Christine. Like I said, REVIEW!!**


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